Why Does Everyone Ask About a First Look?

First looks are becoming more and more popular every year, and every one has a reason why to do it or not to.  I was married back in 2009 and did a first look

because for us it was right and the better option.  So from a personal look, not a photographer’s view point, here is why I believe you should consider them.

1) Intimacy

You have been planning this wedding for months now. You’ve been really busy and stressed the weeks leading up to your wedding.  You probably haven’t had a conversation with your soon to be spouse that didn’t involve wedding day details, to do lists, or schedules.  So take all that anxiety and imagine your beloved helping to melt it away.

 THAT is a first look.  Your feelings for each other and the anticipation of saying “I do” don’t go away after a first look.  A first look is a moment when the two of you two get quality alone time on the busiest day of your life.  (I would say biggest day, but just wait for kids!)  When a groom sees his bride coming down the aisle, he isn’t allowed to hold her, touch her, or even compliment her.  He holds the emotion in because he’s in front of a lot of people.

 In a first look, it is just the two of you.   I’m off in the distance not interrupting at all for the first 10 minutes, while you two get to SEE each other, HOLD each other, and HELP each other.  At the end of the first look, you get to head out to your wedding day TOGETHER.

 

2) Being Present

Remember that stress?  Now imagine if the ceremony is running late (they usually do), and there’s traffic to the venue, and the sun is setting, and the bridesmaid with a baby needs to nurse, and…………….. etc.

Now imagine getting to your ceremony with the only major thing left to do is family portraits and dancing at the reception.

 WAIT! WHAT?   Yep, you can get to the ceremony knowing that, during the cocktail hour, you will get to say hi to everyone.

 So You have your ceremony to look forward to and the promise to be present and invest in your marriage for the rest of your life.  And then you get to celebrate those promises.

3) Extra Time

Instead of 15/20 minutes of photos, you get as long as you want!  It’s your day and having everything photographed is why you hire a professional photographer.  But why limit what can be captured?

As I said before, my husband and I did a first look.  They weren’t as popular back then, but it was something I wanted because I wanted GREAT photos.  No matter how beautiful or wonderful everything was on my wedding day, I knew I wasn’t going to be able to soak it all in, so I wanted everything captured in photos.

And what I really wanted was great photos of Tom and myself (I mean hello! it’s my wedding).  So, instead of having my guests wait 2 hours in between the ceremony and reception, I did a first look.  I was driven by my maid of honor, and Tom was driven by his best man, to an offsite location where our photographer set us up.  We had about 15/20 minutes to ourselves.  I instantly saw the relief and adoration flood Tom’s eyes as he saw me for the first time. Without thinking he embraced me and kissed me and I just remember talking into his suit as I’m being hugged saying that I loved him, and thanking him for showing up (weird stress I know but we didn’t talk all day! He could have peaced out!)

After that, we went to our second location and did family photos, bridal party photos, and a few more romantic shots. We weren’t rushed or nervous.  We all headed to the church as a group.  The ceremony had a few hiccups (including me dropping my unity candle holder) but it was all ok, I had my husband and best friend by my side. The rest of the evening was a blur of dancing, greeting guests, wondering if I could eat in the bathroom since no one would follow me in there, and and lots of laughter.

Yes, all of that was because I have an amazing community of family and friends,  but I was PRESENT for all of it because I was unhurried and unstressed thanks to my First Look.

I’m going to end with a few of mine: WE LOOK LIKE BABIES!!

  1. Leslyn

    January 16th, 2018 at 7:44 pm

    I LOVE this post. Brought tears to my eyes several times. So real and so vulnerable. As you know, Ron and I do a lot of premarital counseling and weddings, may I have permission to share this article with the couples we counsel? Thank you for sharing your heart and experience.

  2. JLPhotography

    January 29th, 2018 at 5:20 pm

    of course leslyn!

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